Sunlight, Moonlight
by rawrrkitty
Summary: All his life, he yearned for one thing: silence. He thought that only one queen could grant him that, but she betrayed him. But now, as he turns to leave, he finds his reason to live. Twoshot.
1. Sunlight, Moonlight

**Sunlight, Moonlight**

**Disclaimer: I admit it; my name is not T. S. Eliot. Therefore, I don't own cats or any of its characters, unfortunately...oh, the things I could do...**

**Warning: This is obscure, and plain weird. A lot of you may not like it. Adult themes, fo' sure. Watch out, friends.  
**

I was going crazy.

I've known for a long time, of course. It was inevitable. Bast, I could feel it sucking every and any chance of normality away from me. I wasn't sick. No, I knew it wasn't that. It was the voices. The voices all around me, crowding me, pushing me into myself. How could any cat stand to live with all the noise?

I knew about them. About all of them. I knew that he loved her, but that she had her eye on another tom. I knew that these two were cheating on each other without even knowing, and that those two were making plans to run away from the tribe. I knew _everything_. But I never asked for it. I never wanted it, and I know that I never will. The voices chase me, beat me until I'm forced to listen. The endless babble, all trying to talk over one another, all unknowingly confessing their inner demons to me. Even when I walk and walk and walk to get away from the endless torture, there's always that hum in the background. It never shuts up.

They don't understand me. Often, when I pass through, I see their wide eyes. They only hear silence, but I hear their loud, obnoxious voices proclaiming that I was a freak. A loner. That I wasn't welcome. Their voices would press in on me until I would feel like curling up into a ball and screaming. I just wanted them to _shut up_.

They say that magic is a blessing. Of course, they only know _him_. That sparkly, tuxedoed tom who had a habit of shooting lightning from his paws. _All_ the fricken' time. He'd dance around on his toes, deftly making things appear and disappear. The queens would gasp, would swoon, would cry out, 'Magical Mister Mistoffelees!' They'd crowd around him, touch his glittering fur, tell him of how they wished they could be magical just like him. Ha! If only they knew what true magic was like…

Those twins know as well. They're always seeing, whereas I'm always hearing. We have a sort of understanding, but that doesn't mean that they're like me. At least they can share the torture. I have to endure it alone, all the while watching the tuxedoed kitten prancing around. _Glitterpaws._ Oh, how I envied him. How I wished my magic were so simple.

I wasn't going to last much longer. Soon, I would have to leave. I'd been told it, by my own father no less, yet I'd been planning to anyway. In the Junkyard, I had no peace. I couldn't even sleep, because the voices kept up their chatter through dreams as well. In fact, it was worse at night. I'd hear voices crying, screaming, pleading. I just wanted to ignore it all, because I knew not even that type of pain could measure to my own.

I was told to leave because I was dangerous. I knew it myself, and so did my father. He told me too many had been hurt. That too many were terrified of me, of the shadows creeping about in my eyes. Of the fire that was my fur. I wanted to leave because maybe, just maybe, I could find a place where the voices would fade. Where I could curl up and simply _sleep_. It was all I wanted. To be able to close my bloodshot eyes and hear a perfect silence. My heart, or whatever was left of it, yearned for silence.

So I had to leave. Better sooner than later. Better today than tomorrow. My mind was made up; I was ready to go. There was nothing left for me in the Junkyard.

Not now that _she_ didn't want me. Not after what she'd done to me.

The thought of her sent tingles down my spine. I'd imagine that I was running my hands through her silken, golden fur once again. I saw those ice-blue eyes everywhere, staring out at me from every shadowed corner. I couldn't even bear to think of her name anymore. I know that I will never taste those letters upon my tongue again as I feel her soft body beneath me. Those memories, they're unbearable. They haunt me, make my life even more of a living hell than it was before I met her. I sometimes think that she'll come back for me, because she claimed to understand me. But she never really did, and she's never coming back. I know that now.

She was the only one whose company didn't torture me. She was like sunlight; utter bliss. Sunlight had no voice, only warmth and beautiful, golden rays that spread across the world like liquid. That was why I compared her to it. Her thoughts never pressed in on me. With her, I was allowed some peace of mind. I explained that to her, told her that I loved her. She told me she understood, that she was sorry, that she loved me too. I told her, as long as I had her forever, I would be okay. She heard those words. She nodded and smiled. I believed her.

But she left me. She left me for my bastard brother, and she destroyed any chance I'd ever had of peace. Of silence. She betrayed me, and now I hated her, yet at the same time, I wanted her. I was a mere fool, and she was the devil. I hated her.

Those thoughts in mind, I padded towards the main part of the Junkyard one last time. I needed to see the place I hated, commit it to memory so that one day, I could express to them my pain. What I'd suffered all my life. As I neared it, though, the voices didn't pounce on me as usual. They held back, a dull murmur at the back of my mind. My eyes narrowed, because I'd experienced that a long time ago. Only _she_ could make the voices quiet down. The closer I came to her, the more voices that shut up. I closed my eyes, enjoying it. I really didn't want to see her; I knew that if I did, I'd probably kill her. I'd gotten close to it very many times, and now when she saw me, she'd cry out in fear. It sent tremors of pleasure up my spine. But if I did kill her, I'd never be able to take her silence with me. I planned to return one day, to come back so I could claim her. My brother would hate me, and so would she, but I didn't care about their happiness any more. Only I mattered.

Before I could turn to finally leave though, a voice rang out clearly. It didn't force its way into my head; it was truly echoing through the air. I listened closely, smiling slightly as it drowned out the other voices entirely.

_Burnt out ends of smoky days  
The stale cold smell of morning  
The streetlamp dies, another night is over  
Another day is dawning_

I took a step forward, and then another. And then I saw her face. That sweet, kitten face. It wasn't golden, not like _her._ It was the child of sunlight. As I saw how the light of the moon above embraced her, of how her voice sent silvery chills through my body, I named her moonlight. Sunlight had given birth to moonlight. How had I not found her before? How could I have so completely missed those wide, blue eyes, eyes the exact same color as _hers_?

As I inched slowly forward, she turned. Full lips, slightly parted. A faint rosy blush on her cheeks. Her voice faded as I approached her, and with a start, I saw that a smile graced her beautiful face. That was when I saw the tinges of red through her calico fur, and halted abruptly. This was the child of sunlight; moonlight. But who was her father?

I closed my eyes and shook my head slightly. I couldn't stop, couldn't miss this chance. The voices had all faded away; this kitten was granting me the silence I yearned for so much. I _needed_ her. I needed those innocent eyes, gazing sweetly into mine just as _her_ eyes had.

"The mystery cat," she murmured as I stopped before her. Her voice was filled with wonder. I was different from what she had expected. There were no shadows in my eyes, not when I looked upon her sweet face. I leant in to caress her face with the gentlest of hands, stroking her blushing cheeks. I closed my eyes and sighed, realizing her fur had the same silken quality as _hers._

My mind was telling me to stop. That one tiny rational part of me clung on, making me doubt myself. But how could I stop? How could I resist the tender lips mere inches away from my own?

Who was this kitten's father? It could very well be me.

I didn't care.

A soft sigh escaping my lips, I pulled her towards me, pulling her into my arms, embracing her. The moonlight fell upon us, lighting us up as I kissed her, my heart pounding as her lips moved against mine. Never had I thought that I could feel this way again. Not after _she_ had left me. Yet, here I was, with another beautiful, young queen. It was wrong, but I wasn't going to stop.

I would have my moment of bliss before I left.

As I pulled away, as I turned to leave, I felt her tiny hand upon my shoulder. "Wait," she whispered in that melodic voice. "Where are you going?"

I sighed wearily. "I'm going, that's all. I'm leaving here. This isn't my place."

Her hand remained in place. "Will you come back?"

I turned to face her once more, committing her perfect face to memory. "For you, I will," I promised softly, wishing I could touch those soft lips just one more time. But I couldn't. I was too dangerous for a delicate kitten such as her. Later, if I could, then I would. I didn't care that she was the daughter of sunlight, and that the identity of her father was a mystery.

But until then, I would simply remember the feeling of her lips caressing my own.

**A/N: I find myself obsessed with magic and price that comes with it…I came up with **_**this**_** and I've been itching to write it since…well, yesterday. Nonetheless.**

**If people like it, I may make it into a two-shot. That is, if you're really that interested. **

**And just remember, if you wish you could hear peoples' thoughts…think again.**

**rawrrkitty, signing out. ;)**


	2. Returning For Her

**Returning For Her**

**A/N: How could I resist? Sunlight, Moonlight is officially a two-shot. This is for Nekosoda; apparently, you wanted more, no? **

**Warnings: I suppose it might be a bit difficult to understand everything in this story. So if you're either a bit slow or 5 years old, don't read. You won't get it.**

**Three words: Macavity is awesome. So are obscure pairings. We need more of that messed-up stuff.

* * *

**

It was that very night when I returned, and it was no coincidence. The moonlight had sought me out and spoken to me. I'd seen her silvery light, creeping towards me, dismissing the shadows that clung to me. She'd told me, 'The Jellicle Ball approaches on the night of the Jellicle Moon, merely one moon cycle away.' And she hadn't said anything more, but I knew that she was inviting me. If only she had the right.

But I was coming anyway, if only to see her. The kitten whose face was a permanent image in my brain, in my heart. I wondered if she had changed. If she had grown. It had been quite a while since the night that I had discovered her.

The sound of music was already pulsing through the streets as I drew close. I winced as the voices slammed into me, re-entering my head. I hated their familiarity. Gritting my teeth, I attempted to dismiss them as I had learnt to while by myself, but there were so many of them, and they knew me well. They wouldn't leave me alone. "Piss off," I grumbled, clutching vainly at my head.

I'd have to move faster. If I found my moonlight, she'd bless me with her perfect silence. I imagined the silence descending over me like a blanket, and my pace immediately quickened. I wanted that sweet kitten so much.

And there I was. Standing outside the source of the music, a place all-too-familiar to me. I could hear footfalls as cats danced, voices singing in perfect pitch and timing. Voices that, for once, did not push into my head irritatingly. One voice rose above the rest, clear, sweet, pure. Better. The essence of moonlight was one with her voice, and of course, I knew who she was. How could I forget the sound of that silvery voice, tempting me to come closer, closer? How could I forget the feel of those soft lips, begging me to hold her, tighter, tighter?

I hesitated, drowning in the utter perfection of that voice before I took a fleeting look at what was going on within the Junkyard. Ah…I recognized all their faces, but their names were a mere blur in my memory. How was I meant to remember all of them? No, I knew them by sight. I really didn't care to put names to their faces.

I didn't even know the moonlight's name. How pitiful.

I sauntered closer, my footsteps silent. Still, _she_ sensed me. Sunlight. The golden one. What was her name? Ah, I couldn't even remember hers. I almost laughed at that thought. I could hardly remember my own name…the only thing that reminded me, in fact, was the sunlight.

"_Macavity!_" she cried, freezing into place.

At once, the cats moved. _Away_. They ran, skittering clumsily away like frightened mice. I sneered at them, but they couldn't even see me. In fact, a few cats ran past me, completely unaware of the fire that was me flickering dimly in the shadows. The sunlight ran past me, too. I froze at her familiar scent, and my eyes followed her as she ran, her gait graceful as she loped down the street. The light of the moonlight caught at the gold in her fur, but it looked unnatural. There was no sunlight at nighttime; only moonlight. Where was my moonlight?

They returned, of course. They couldn't be afraid for too long; after all, the only indication I was even present was the sunlight's hyperawareness of me. I should've known not to hurt her too much. She'd known to watch out for me now, to flinch away from the flames. I pondered then, whether I should even show my face. I had every right to be there; I was born the son of their leader and their blood ran through my veins. The moon herself had sought me out to invite me. Bast, she was the only one who cared.

I watched, and as I watched, I felt all the more disgusted. They were a pitiful bunch to be sure. I couldn't believe that I had been born as one of them…and I was so glad to have broken away. Away from them, I'd lost track of their petty troubles. Their faces had changed, aged. I was glad that I was separate from them now. I only had eyes for one cat. She was moonlight personified. She was so beautiful.

She _had_ changed in my absence. She was not quite as kittenish, and it shamed me to say that it took away some of her appeal to me. But every bit of me still yearned for her. I imagined running my hands down her slender body, hearing her moan softly. I imagined kissing those soft lips again; gently at first, to show that I meant no harm, and then more passionately. Roughly. I knew that there was far more to her innocent face than she betrayed.

Oh, yes. I saw her dancing with that cocky tom. I named him Patches for his black and white fur. I watched them very closely, in fact. There had to be something between them; how else could they dance so closely? How else could she stand to let him touch her in that way? He didn't deserve to. I wondered if they had ever been _closer_. I wondered if she had forgotten me so soon. I hadn't forgotten her; she was always the subject of my dreams.

And I was angry at her, but I _still_ couldn't resist those eyes of hers. What a damn fool I was.

_Moonlight, turn your face to the moonlight  
Let your memory lead you  
Open up, enter in  
If you find there the meaning of what happiness is  
Then a new life will begin_

I lifted my head. That voice was unmistakable. And there she was. She lifted her young face to gaze at the moon, and it bathed her in its light, approving. She told me to turn my face to the moonlight, and I did. _My_ moonlight. I couldn't tear my eyes away from her, because as much as I hated to admit it, her words had touched me deeply. How was it that a kitten could have so much effect on me?

I thought about her words for a very long time. And then I took action. I revealed myself to them, and the sunlight gave her usual cry of, "_Macavity!_" But this time, they didn't run. I grinned sadistically at them, and they recognized me and the blazing flames I brought with me. I stared down upon them all, taking care to look very carefully at the sunlight and the moonlight. The sunlight's eyes were wide, her small frame shaking at the very sight of me. The moonlight…that faint blush had returned to her cheeks. She was gazing upon me almost longingly. _It won't be long now, _I promised her silently, and she understood. She always did.

Unthinkingly, I sent my shadows out. They snapped forward, bent to my will, and they wrapped themselves around my father, stealing him away. The cats were frozen into place, and I let out a vicious laugh before twisting away and disappearing from right before their eyes. This was just a distraction. I wanted to be bathed within gentle light again. This was how I would steal the light away.

It was strange that they sang for me. The sunlight and her sister. They were both beauties, but neither could compare to the moonlight. I wanted the moonlight to sing for me, and _only_ her. Still, I could see that the sunlight did harbor feelings for me, even after all this time. Even after she'd pulled away from me. I knew that I'd made her feel incredible; unlike my brother. He couldn't compare to me.

A distraction. It was all a distraction. But the sunlight saw right through it. She fought with her fear, and she ran at me. I didn't care. I'd been expecting it. She ripped away my disguise, and the cats cried out in disgust as I raised my fiery arms and grinned. The moonlight stared at me again, transfixed, and I knew then that she could care less about Patches. She wanted me, and nobody else. But I was still angry. So angry. When I got angry, it was hard to calm down.

I hoisted her into my arms, ready to run with my prize. Not the moonlight. The sunlight. She let out a shrill scream at my very touch, and the moonlight's eyes filled with sharp disappointment. It sent needles into my heart, but what did I care? I barely had a heart anymore.

I should've seen the cats coming for me. My bastard brother-my, hadn't he grown up-and good old Patches. I ripped at snarl at the pair of them as they took the sunlight back. I was ready to rip out Patches' heart for touching my moonlight, for stealing my sunlight, but my brother was too fast. He cornered me into a fight, and I studied the muscles rippling under his silver coat, fascinated by how strong he'd grown. But he was nothing, _nothing_ to me. I knocked him away; it was too simple. His body lay still in the dust.

I knew then that it was too late. Cats were pushing my moonlight back, protecting my sunlight. The stronger ones had the nerve to try and drive me away. It wasn't because I was outnumbered that I fled. It was because I knew I could wait just a little longer for my silence.

Just a little longer…

* * *

She waited for me in the pale moonlight. She _was_ the moonlight to me.

I came to her quietly, but she still heard me with ease. Smiling, she turned to me. I regarded her coldly.

"Why did you dance with him?" I snarled, refusing to come close to her. Her smile just widened.

"With Alonzo?"

"If that's Patches' name, then yeah. Him." I felt as if were on fire. I wanted her, but I needed to find out why she'd betrayed me.

"Why did you try make off with my mother?" she asked mildly. She'd got me. She was too clever beneath those innocent eyes. Far too clever.

Suited for me…

"I was in love with her once. A long time ago." My eyes darkened. "She gave me silence, just like you. And then…she met my bastard brother. You get me?"

"Yes," she replied simply. Easily, she sauntered down to meet me, the moonlight trailing behind her like a faithful pet. Then she clasped my big red paws and leant her head into my chest. "Macavity…"

She spoke my name so beautifully. Something inside of me clicked.

"I danced with Alonzo as a _pretense_. Munkustrap believes that he is my tomfriend and that we are to be mated. We…are not."

"Don't you love him?"

She blinked at me as if the answer were obvious. "Of course not. He may think so, but I won't be there for him to be mated to me."

"Oh?"

"I'm coming with you." She spoke so assertively that I was almost shocked. I'd been planning to steal her away anyway…but it was as if her mind was linked with my own.

"Obviously," I said finally, my voice coming out as a croon. I hadn't spoken in such a way since the days with the sunlight. I cradled her and kissed her forehead. And then I paused.

"Do you know who you are?"

"I'm Jemima." She raised an eyebrow at me, tempting me with her rosy cheeks and full lips.

_Jemima. So that's her name… _"That's not what I meant."

"I am a Jellicle…Demeter's daughter." She stopped then, and glanced up at my face. "Macavity's daughter, too," she added resignedly.

"So you think so too." I stepped away from her, and she fell to the ground without the support of my arms. Closing my eyes, I sighed. "I'll go now."

"Don't go." She stood up and ran after me, her little paws beating against the ground as she followed me.

"Don't follow me." I kept walking, ignoring the tug of her paw on my arm. But I couldn't keep ignoring her. Not when she sang.

"_Moonlight, turn your face to the moonlight,  
Let your memory lead you,  
Open up, enter in,  
If you find there the meaning of what happiness is,  
Then a new life will begin."_

I groaned. "What are you trying to do?"

"I'm trying to tell you something," she said matter-of-factly. "Do I make you happy, Macavity? Do you remember kissing me…?"

_Stop it, stop it!_ "…Yes."

"If you remember…then take me with you. I don't care that you're my father. I want to leave with you."

Who could resist those eyes of hers? Cunning, cunning kitten.

I kissed her again, ignoring the alarm that went off in my head. I felt her lips smiling against my own. She'd won.

"Take me," she breathed. "Take me away with you. I'll be yours…"

The temptation overwhelmed me. I simply nodded. She'd won. She'd tamed me. She had me under her power.

She always would.

* * *

**A/N: Okay…so this really IS the end of Sunlight, Moonlight. Jemima/Macavity is lovely, though. It was fun.**

**Now go read my other stories. I command you.**

…**yeah, that ain't going to work, huh?**

**rawrrkitty.  
two r's. TWO.  
I don't know why the hell I bothered with my random spazz.**

**I'll shut up now. **


End file.
